A PARABLE FOR OUR TIME
The enormous amount of money that was poured into Project Cuppa by the US Army during WWII paid dividends when the CE (Caffeine Energy) bomb was released over Hiroshima and brought the war to an end.
The CE bomb also called a HS Bomb (High Stress) caused the entire population of Hiroshima to go on a wild jag after which they all lay down for a nap. The Japanese Government realized that the jig was up and sued for peace.
At the end of the war the rebuilding of our economy and the Folger Plan to rebuild Europe generated a huge demand for caffeine energy and it was not long before the CEC (Caffeine Energy Commission) encouraged private energy companies to build a 100 billion dollar caffein generation plants around the country. This necessitated pipe line linkages to the homes of coffee consumers all over the US. The network, designated The Grind, was not only expensive but also managed to lose about 40% of the caffeine in transit. The huge plants also incited violent opposition from the general public who complained that all of the leaked caffein was damaging to their children. Siting of the linked breweries becme more and more of a problem especially since the caffeine was best move dissolved in water leading to serious problems of water resources and also killed many fish. There was also the puzzling problem of storing mountains of coffee grinds. Nobody wanted that in their back yard.
The Caffeine Energy industry, because of the increasing demand for caffeine energy was able to pre avail against public opinion until two unfortunate events occurred.
In 1980 a stuck valve at Three Mile Island plant near Pittsberg caused the aroma of roasting coffee to blanket that city resulting in the population going on a wild jag and then laying down for a nap. This was bad enough until a bit later the enormous brewing plant in the Chernobyl, designed as a replica of an enormous Oldenberg type percolator, blew the little glass cap off the top releasing coffee aroma which could not be quickly halted due to overheating of the roasting ovens. The westerly winds spread over much of Soviet Eastern Europe causing even longer naps than were usual.
Thus ended the official dalliance with Caffeine Energy and the next thirty years no new CE plants were built.
But American ingenuity was not to be gainsayed and a small company on the West coast came up with a plan designed to assuage the increasing addiction to caffeine energy that did not require more expensive and dangerous monster coffee pot buildings. The new company's plan was simple and brilliant. Instead of piping, at huge expense from plants that were proven to be somnabulantly dangerous, why not build small breweries that required no pipelines since the caffeine addicts could come to the small breweries for their fix. So the first Starbucks was born. It was designed as a replica of a latte pot and was an instant success.
The Latte Pots were easy and quick to build and the concept of small modular caffein breweries (SMB) swept across the nation. They were cheap and could be thrown up in a week or so. They were welcomed not only by the CAs (caffeine addicts) but also by many groups not the least of which were the city coffers which were enriched by local taxes. There was little chance of escaping aroma except into the immediate area where it was a welcome relief from the normal effluvia of the city. In small amounts the escaped aroma was not enough for a jag and, indeed, induced a slight frisson of well being in passersby. The small amount of waste grinds was easily dispensed by Grind Disposal machines installed right there in the kitchen eliminating the need to truck mountains of grind expensively around the country seeking, and in most cases, failing, to find a welcoming dump.
This is what has become known as The Starbuck Solution or SCR, Starbuck Caffeine Reactors. The Starbuck Solution revolutionized the generation of Caffeine Energy. Built on a factory assembley line and shipped on a semi each SCR produced about 10% of the monster coffee percolators. 10 SCRs were being built in 10 days instead of 10 years for the Large Caffeine Reactors (LCRs). The cost of 10 SCRs is $250 M compared to the cost of one LCR which ran to $15 B to build and $8B to tear down. 10 SCRs linked modularly produced as much caffeine as on LCR and there was no longer any need for expensive, highly engineered and leaky pipelines.
Eventually the Starbuck Solution was exported and was especially welcomed in China which was being criticized for "increasing aroma pollution" and could hardly afford a couple of hundred thousand miles of the pipe lines needed to caffeine that vast country. Indeed the Solution, by making cheap caffeine jags and naps local and easy to obtain, caused terrorists in the Near East to take long naps. The vast Saudi Coffee Percolators which had held most of the world in thrall were shut down.
The Solution solved a longtime caffeine related problem in the Sahara area. While it was possible to import caffeine to Africa there was only salt water available. No coffee could be brewed. 100,000 Starbucks SCRs were installed in the desert. The resulting output of High Caffeine Energy was put to work turning salt water into the sweet so necessary for a well designed Latte.
Surfeited with caffeine most of the world soon found war to be an intrusion into the long naps that followed the Caffeine jags. Those few national governments which still demonstrated warlike stances were soon brought to heel by the United Nations instituting caffeine sanctions. The resulting public clamor by CAs (caffeine addicts) overthrew these governments in what was to become known as The Great Starbucks Revolution.
